Saturday, October 26, 2013

Culinary School/Baking & Pastry Class...kitchen...food...stuff

First of all, what if I changed my blog name from, "The Soap Box" to "The Donut Box"? The tag-line could be, "You might not get exactly what you want, but whatever you end up with will still be pretty damn good." ...because it is a donut. And even if it is a cherry filled jelly donut (puke) it is still good...because it is still a freaking donut


I'm sorry that the quality of these pictures is so awful-- I used my phone to take them. Also, please take note of the sweet hats (and general awkward getup) that the girls (on the fourth picture down) are wearing. Yes, I too get to look that awesome during class! I know, we're pretty much the coolest kids around town. Or not. Let's just say that there are very few fashion statements being made at culinary school. But everyone looks equally ridiculous, so it is (kind of) OK. 

I don't know about you, but donuts speak to me. Mostly they just say, "Eat me right this second, Lauren." But there is so much more to these delectable treats than fluffy deep fried goodness covered in sweet buttery icing.
 If a donut could talk, what do you think it would say? You don't know, do you? That is because you never listen to your fried treats. Shame on you. Well, if a donut could talk, I think it would say, "There's a God shaped hole in all of us..." And then it would follow up that comment by saying, "Just kidding--there is a donut-hole shaped hole in all of us...suckaaa!" And of course they would make a silly joke like that--because donuts are funny. That is what they want to tell you--that they are funny. That is why they make you so damn happy. We really should listen to them more.








I know, I'm sorry--that was a lot of pictures of donuts. You should see me during class...I am always taking 500 million pictures of my food. (But hey, I'm not posting them to Instagram. So I'm not that person. Yet.)

I always try to rearrange the food in a semi-appetizing way before I take 20 pictures of it, because at the end of the semester we have to make a portfolio of everything we have baked and include pictures of it all. That is why I try to take good pictures--so that my portfolio doesn't look like crap. And since my phone takes pretty awful pictures, I already have that working against me. Consequently, I have to take quite a few pictures before I get one semi-decent photo.
 Well, my classmates started noticing and commenting on how many pictures I was taking. So a few weeks ago I started joking that I did it because I was OCD and I needed everything to be absolutely perfect or whatever. Well...apparently the joke really caught on. Because now everyone in my class thinks that I am actually legitimately OCD. And they make comments about it fairly often. This past week when we were making donuts, one girl commented on how perfect one of my donuts looked. And then another girl said, "Oh, it's just because Lauren is OCD. You probably rolled that dough out 20 times just to get a perfect shape, didn't you, Lauren?" I laughed and was like, "Yeah, totally." I just played along because I don't really care if they think I'm OCD. But inside I'm just like ...guys, I'm not actually OCD. I was just kidding. Everyone always jokes about being OCD?

    I don't know though, maybe I am. At least a little. But aren't we all a little OCD? 

    Anywho. Moving right along.

   Baguettes are not as funny as donuts. You don't have to talk to them to find that out.
You can tell just by looking at them. 
    Well, and they're French. So they wouldn't talk to you anyways. 






Oh look! There I am with my little baguette baby. So, I kind of think baguette could be an adorable term of endearment for a kid.
 Like, "Oh, come here mon petit baguette..." My poor kids--they're totally going to hate me.


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This blog is basically how I de-stress from 1.) all the awkwardness I encounter and cause on a daily basis and 2.) life in general. You know all of those little situations and bumps in the road that you don't give a second that about? (No, you don't know, because you didn't give them a second thought.) Well, those kinds of situations tend to create existential dilemmas in my soul. So at some point I will probably give you too much in depth information on my emotional, spiritual, and mental health, because some self-absorbed part of me thinks you really want to know.

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